Behind the scenes can be a bore, especially when it's the director going on and on about

the making of his film, so when asked to provide an insightful look at what went into bring-

ing Rats to the screen, I decided to subcontract.

What follows are two very distinct views of the Rats production, and in the spirit of equal

opportunity, they're written by a guy and a girl.

'Mad' Malcolm Ingram is a freelancer for Film Threat Magazine. He and Threat editor (and

all-around cool guy) Paul Zimmerman arrived during the first week of production to do a Rats

piece for one of the coolest film mags on the stands today (can you tell they gave us a cover?).

Eventually - due to the demands of big time periodical publishing - Paul departed.

But Malcolm never did.

He stayed on longer than most of the P.A.'s, morphing from journalist to mallrat. Perhaps

this violates some rule of distance between reporter and subject, but Malcolm didn't care, I

didn't care, no one else seemed to care, and so he stuck around, not only to do hot tub inter-

views and have lots of dinners on the film's tabs, but also to pillage most of my cast for his

movie - Drawing Flies (the bastard stole Jason Lee, Jason Mewes, Renee Humphries, Joey

Adams, Popular Girl and Brodie-spouse Carmen Lee... hell, even yours truly, not only for a

cameo but also as a producer along Scott Mosier).

Being that he's such an intimate (not like that, you sick fuck!), who better than he to write ab-

out the production?

Well...Joey for one.

I've never met anyone - anyone - as quick as Joey. Now by that, I don't mean that she's faster

than Wally West (the Flash for all you unwashed, non-comic heathens) - I mean her timing, her

sense of humor, her off-the-cuff references are incomparable. She was only around for two wee-

ks, but to me, Joey is the embodiment of Mallrats - the sprit, the humor, the anarchy, the sheer

beauty of something so quirky, it snaps at you like a seal (seals bite - I just found this out). When

she was finished shooting, I almost wanted to rewrite the flick, just to keep her and Gwen around

for the duration of the shoot (something a bit less involved, like asking her on a date instead, would-

n't occur to me for a few months).

Anyway, here's the dish (what little there is) on the production - some funny, some scary, all of

it true.

The View From the Floor
Joey Tells All