Posted by Obi Weed Kenobi at proxy-196.iap.bryant.webtv.net on November 23, 1999 at 01:31:58:
In Reply to: I second that *NO TICKETS* posted by Brodie Man on November 22, 1999 at 21:31:59:
: : : Well, being the smithite that I was, I, of course, went to see Dogma as soon as I was able(last nite). After seeing the film, Kevin Smith, you owe me the price of admission. I've never been so ripped off before! You used to be a good director, what happened?
: : : Things that ruined my evening and film-going experience:
: : : 1)The flat acting. I KNOW Ben Affleck sucks ass, but the rest of your case? Well, I was expecting more. Did they just get their lines the night before filming? They were so lifeless!
: : : 2)The poorly shot scenes. You did this all in no more than two takes, right? I hope so, because it certainly looked that way. If not, you just suck.
: : : 3)The hockey kid demons. Kevin Smith, you were reading FAR too many issues of mage when you wrote them into the script. Quit aping your superiors.
: : : 4)Ben Affleck. He needs to be singled out. Even IF the movie was actually good, his poor acting would have ruined it for me.
: : : 5) Alanis Morrisette. It’s not that I’m opposed to a female god(hey, I don’t believe in God, why should I care what sex it is?) but HER?!?! WHAT the hell was she doing? She wasn’t playing God. Perhaps God’s retarded younger sister; but not God. You want a whimsical god? Watch “Time Bandits” again, TG does it right.
: : : That is all. You owe me $7.50 for that shit Kevin Smith.
: : : -Noc
: : I think you owe everyone who read this rude, pompous, self-important rant $7.50. That should just about cover the expense for the time they took away from their adult world to read your childish whining and bitching.