Posted by Pootie Tang at 80.minneapolis-08-09rs.mn.dial-access.att.net on August 03, 2000 at 01:37:10:
Coyote Ugly
Jerry Bruckheimer’s COYOTE UGLY marks the return for the producer to smaller, more character driven films that aren’t directed by Michael Bay (though he cameos here) and feature the main character getting into fist fights in front of oil rigs, making sure to dodge the occasional fireball that chases him. This time Bruckheimer leans more toward storytelling that bears striking similarity to his aspiring welder/dancer creation FLASHDANCE from 1983. Now it’s 2000, and Bruckheimer brings forth COYOTE UGLY onto the world. It’s his worst film to date.
Violet (Piper Perabo) is a young, naive girl from suburban New Jersey who longs to find success as a song writer in New York. Upon arrival in the big apple, Violet quickly learns that the music business is one cold mistress and is soon short on cash. Desperate and poor, Violet finds a job at a seedy bar called Coyote Ugly and quickly learns the ropes required for the jiggle and smile saloon. Trying to balance her work, her lonely father (John Goodman), a lover (Adam Garcia), a boss that’s a bit too business oriented (PAYBACK’s Maria Bello), and two co-workers that love and hate her (Izabella Miko and Bridget Moynahan), Violet also tries to keep her dream of music alive.
Like every Bruckheimer picture, COYOTE UGLY is not so much a film as it is a corporate product. It’s neither heartfelt nor correctly performed. Turning the material into camp would be too much, yet remaining subservient to the upbeat FLASHDANCE moral would be too earnest in this day and age. UGLY comes off too self aware. Like the film was second guessed recently and had to be reedited into material we’ve all seen before. Montages contain what looks like deleted footage we should be seeing, and characters appear and disappear at a moment’s notice. UGLY is a mess.
And after squawking about THE REPLACEMENTS soundtrack recently, I can’t hardly believe my ears when COYOTE UGLY begins to play Gloria Gaynor’s I WILL SURVIVE in the opening of the picture. What? Did this song become public domain recently and I wasn’t told? Couple that with 5 or 6 airings of EMF’s UNBELIEVABLE, and you’ve got yourself a insanely undernourished soundtrack. When Violet begins to play her original tunes (that noise you hear the Disney crossing their fingers, hoping for a radio crossover), they end up sounding as dated and forgettable as Def Leppard’s POUR SOME SUGAR ON ME (in the film as well).
In the lead role, relative newcomer Piper Perabo (THE ADVENTURES OF ROCK AND BULLWINKLE) does little to dispel the dark cloud that has been hanging over her since she hit the screen. It’s not that she’s a bad actress, nor is she hard to look at. She’s simply a Julia Roberts clone without the poise and charm of the smiley superstar. With perfectly tousled hair, a crooked grin, and all the personality of a lemonade selling eight year-old, Perabo forgets to infuse her character with the sensuality needed to bring the film to life. With her geeky stance and limited range, Perabo comes off more as jail bait than the naive but sexually volcanic singer the she’s supposed to be. It certainly doesn’t help that actor Adam Garcia is of the same aesthetic. Allegedly the love interest, Garcia is stiff with Perabo and their scenes of courtship are torture. Saving the day is John Goodman as Violet’s father. Being the veteran actor of the film, Goodman somehow manages to get all the good lines and make all the right dramatic choices.
The girls of COYOTE UGLY are not characters, they are simply overpaid strippers working at the most gaudy bar anyone has ever seen. Director David McNally shoots the girls like a 1987 Motley Crue video, often choosing low angles to make sure we get some serious upskirt action. And while he’s busy setting back the women’s movement 30 years, the rest of us wonder what happened to the movie. Bruckheimer also has the seeds to make UGLY a PG-13 flick. It’s all one big setup and tease for a payoff that never comes. Would this have worked better as an R rated film? Probably not. But at least it would’ve kept it’s promise.
What instead comes at the end of the film is a hastily arranged reshoot (both literally and artistically) that ties up every loose end imaginable, even if it doesn’t make any sense. Throw LeAnn Rimes in the mix to make sure some soundtracks get sold, and presto! Another Jerry Bruckheimer production. Don’t ever believe the hype that COYOTE UGLY is an "audience" picture. As an audience, we all deserve so much better.---- 0/10