Posted by L. Street at 1cust249.tnt5.columbia.sc.da.uu.net on September 06, 2000 at 16:44:43:
Mr.Smith,
It has come to my attention that you will be making Fuzzy Bunnies From Hell, the highly anticipated, big budget new film from Producer Jerry Bruckheimer. I am an actor. ( I HAVE BEEN IN HIGHWAYS AND DIEWAYS COMMERCIAL AND 6 DEGREES OF SEPERATION, tHE PLAY OF THE MOVIE WITH FRESH PRINCE ABOUT KEVIN BACON) I think that, given my impressive stage pedigree, and acting education (I used to hang out at Cory FELDMAN's HOUSE!!!!) that I would be perfect for the role of the poignant and insidiously witty cigar chomping bunny, Macbeth. ( IT IS AN ILLUSION TO SHAKESPEAR,AN OLD WRITER) I know that you are a busy man, but I AM that bunny. I even practicing my cigar chomping. My Aunt Jennie is already making a costume (complete with Fuzzy BUNNY LOGO VEST!!!!), just for the audition, and if you don't cast me, You WILL BE SORRY, because I am an actor who will rule the world someday, but I might die tomorrow so I have to take a chance now. OH YES!!! I have headshots. My sister works at Glamour Shots and she hooked ME UP.
Sincerly Yours,
W.R.
Who is bored and sick and just took his first anti-depressant pill...WOOHOO