Posted by Ickland at spider-tr023.proxy.aol.com on October 13, 2000 at 16:53:38:
Exactly how many movie pitches do you receive on a weekly basis? Tons I'm assuming. I won't lie, this could be a pitch. And, as most pitches, I should intiate my proposal by first praising your work. Clerks, Mallrats, Dogma ... genius. I'm sad to say I never partook in the experience that was Chasing Amy, although I heard only positive things. Typical? Have you read that sentence before? Many times before? Well, if not, you should've, because frankly, it's true. I myself, I like to consider myself atypical. Oh, it's a thrill a minute. Sitting at home, writing...sometimes I rear my head at social gatherings....I'm promptly alienated because when I snort ridalin, I break out into rapping, and I have a big vocabulary...so, everybody says..."Wow! That Sam fella's funny as shit! Let's get him out here more often!" I'm not much of a social animal. I prefer to have fun. Ah well, enough blathering. Here's my pitch, and thank you for your time.
A boy, much like me, is a janitor, much like me, but he has that "can't be stifled intelligence", much like me. You know the type that thinks they're better than society? Well, he's one of those..unlike me. Therefore, in the spirit of Fight Club and Rage Against the Machine, both of which are mentioned heavily throughout the script, he decides to rebel against societal constraints. Only thing is, he's 17 years old, much like me, and he can't really rebel against society in any sort of way that is at all detrimental to society, so instead, he decides to blow up the mall in which he works in, sort of a "rebellion of meaning, rather than substance," as quoted from the script. He has a girlfriend, much like me, who works at his mall, much like I do, who tells him he's wasting his life...unlike me. She makes some passing reference to how he's never going to amount to anything and that he's a senior and he hasn't even taken the SAT's yet. Pissed royally, he signs up for the SAT's and scores a perfect 1600...not for himself mind you, but rather to spite his girlfriend. Then! Epiphany! Late one night, he realizes the err or his actions of wanting to blow up the mall, but that night is the night the bombs are set to go off. Jeepers! So, he rushes off to stop the explosion, but...he's too late and...he's killed in the explosion...everyone mourns, and through the course of the next couple weeks, his mother discovers the plans he created to destroy the mall...also, as the weeks pass, she starts to receive letters from dozens of Ivy League Schools, who, impressed with the boys high SAT score, and achievements in High School, offer him Scholarships out the wazoo. The script ends with the mother listening to "Stormy Weather" in her kitchen, surround by the bombing evidence, and the Ivy League Letters.
Moral: You younguns' apply yourself, don't be a fool, and put effort into being an important member of society.
The Title: As it's a fairly complicated and heartfelt movie with a fairly simple story, the title is.........The Pitcher in the Wheat. Don't worry, everyone would understand the reference.