Posted by Negative Creep at 1cust31.tnt10.atl2.da.uu.net on September 12, 2001 at 00:00:42:
Woke up this morning for just another day of work, accidentally leaving
setting the alarm to the local hip hop station waking up to Nelly, or
whatever the heck it was, the DJ actually cutting the song off, caught my
attention. he mentioned some attack on new York. groggily, i wondered what
the fuck. Maybe I even, wondered who cares... Im not evil, it's just how i
am. No one even remotely gives a shit about anything nowadays. I turned on
the news like any lookyloo does when he's rubbernecking on the highway,
attracted to the massacre. And what i saw was a strange sight indeed. I
truly didnt understand and even wondered what the fuss was about smoke above
New York's shyline.
Then I saw the other plane hit.
And it seemed strangely surreal. Like a movie or a cartoon, (worlds I spend
my life in)
But maybe shock or numbness towards man's inhumanity to man, kept me from
understanding the magnitude of this event.
Maybe I think it's because it was just images of buildings on TV. and
Buildings could always be repaired. No one was talking about the lives lost.
I heard the reporter at the Pentagon talk about a big blast occuring
outside. And that moment I knew that this wasnt just a random accident, or
the work of lunacy. But a twisted sort of plan of attack against our
government. AGAINST US.
Ive never been any sort of patriot. yes Ive felt the same foolish pride at
the movies, during films like Red Dawn and Independence day. But in really i
care about this country about as much aa Tom does jerry. But I cant imagine
being anywhere else.
And thats just how many of our generation have become dissafected with the
world around us.
A friend phoned me and she not being born in the US. wondered why the towers
had been a target. I explained how they were symbol, of Capitalism.
Democracy and worst of all.. GREED. And it'd be the perfect place to make a
statement towards the United states.
And the attack on the pentagon was to show the world that we were weak and
caught with our pants down. Much like at Pearl Harbor. Comaprisons that
would be thrown about my place of employment and the media throughout the
day.
She then told me the tower collapsed. I was no where near a tv. and couldnt
believe it. An impossibility. Much like the unsinkable titanic was suppsoed
to be. they were indestructable. My brain raced with childhood memories of
images of King Kong in 1977's King Kong Lives and the towers witshstanding
the mighty ape.
Hadn't they survived the BOMB? Years earlier?
I figure maybe a piece had fallen off or something and the newscasters
exaggerate like they often do.
Then she said the second tower fell.
And yet I didnt believe it.
When i got to work we had every television set on every single channel
turned on. And the images were un-fucking-believable.
The two mighty towers collapsing like they were made of building blocks. The
Pentagon, looking like it was cut with a giant axe.
The rumors circulating of more planes. And all airports in terror.
The hijackings.
And then the HATE.
Oh the hate.
I heard people who came to shop at our stores referring to soem of the
others as camel jockeys and sand niggers.
I stood quietly, saying nothing. people who I believed to be open minded
individuals. suddenly open to short spurts of racism.
Angered cause I knew this would nto solve anything. I knew speaking up about
it would do equally no good.
Coworkers ranted, that our borders should be closed for ever, to the huddled
masses seeking refuge. And I knew that no one there in the room and many of
us out there reading this were native to this country. My parents came here
seeking the same opportunites as yours. Whetehr it was ten, 20 years ago or
200.
The President spoke.
And i felt somewhat comforted that there was a Bush in the White House. Even
though I didnt agree with the way he got in there.
Then the images, began to pour through from CBS. They seemed to have their
fingers on the pulse of the nation.
I saw the man choose, Between a fiery death under a collapsing structure,
and a final flight. And I knew deep down inside that I probably wouldve
chosen the same fate.
Going home, I had resolved to help in some way.
To give blood. So i headed toward our local mall.
I ran into a friend I hadnt seen in quite soemtime. and we expressed our
disbelief and wonder. Still unnafected, he joked about the date being
September 11. 9/11 or rather nine-one-one as if it was some cruel irony. Or
if we were the target of bad comedian terrorists.
I gave blood, and was shocked at the gall of the people who felt they were
inconvenienced by the mall closing early.
On my way home, it hit me. as if it had been building up all day. I heard a
rousing Radio announcement as if now more than ever we are neighbors and we
should do what we can to help. Someone on the radio guessed perhaps at a
number of deaths. When he said ten thousand I nearly stumbled. ten thousand
is a city. a nation of people.
And they were just like me. People who got up to go to work and didn't
expect this.
I then heard anotehr radio news guy, who was covering local florida news,
What normally wouldve been a dull broadcast, about what was closed and what
precautions florida was taken.
They cut to him and he was cussing about something not knowing he was live
and then he started his broadcast. He did the monotonous report and then
cut to his opinion of what aheppened. saying he was reminded of the
SPIDERMAN movie trailer. The fucking Spiderman trailer???!! What our minds
go through at times like this? i thought about Independence Day and the
systemtaic destruction of our cities myself.
He went on to describe the cartoon superhero stopping a bad guy by placing
his webs at the WORLD TRADE CENTER. And then he said, how odd that a
cartoon superhero was chosen by my mind to represent the real life flesh and
blood superheroes, who gave their lives to help those folks to get out of
the WTC before it collapsed. His voice then wavered and got emotional,
saying as a nation we should do what we could to help to give blood, money
whatever we could.
maybe as this guys voice wavered and got emotional. Maybe I began to cry. I
wont admit it, ever, probably.
But I'm still shaking as we speak. And haven't been able to regain control.
I heard about 200 firemen who are unnacounted for.
FIREMEN. fathers, and mothers. who didnt have to be there.
Ive called everyone I know and wished them well. And All day Ive tried to
reach out to strangers and neighbors, and if not discussed the events at
least said hello. Maybe our nation just needs to start being neighborly
again.
Maybe, I'll keep it up at least for the rest of the week. and maybe you
guys will too.
I dont really know what else to say. im sorry for being long winded.
God bless you all.
Let's pray for the children who died today. for they are truly innocent.
And at the risk of sounding a bit cheesy. God Bless America.
-John.
"I can't believe the news today
I can't close my eyes And make it go away"