Lesbian Seagull (must read)

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: Hey this is the Blazin Caucasian here, I was just wonderin if u people would tell me if you like this little story I wrote. E-mail me at theblazincaucasian@hotmail.com to tell me what u thought ok. And I got 3 sequels to this on called "Thats Why You the Bitch and Im the Pimp (sequel to Lesbian Seagull)", "Bitch Get Back on Your Knees part 3 of Lesbian Seagull", and "Lesbian Seagull 4 (less talkin, more sucking). Tell me if you would like to see them. On to the story... : : LESBIAN SEAGULL : Time: March 9, 1998 : Place: Jason’s house : (Jason wakes up to a clock-radio playing Prince’s 1999) : Jason : God I hate that fucking song. (He throws the radio across the room) : (Jason is in the shower) (The camera guy walks in) : Jason : Hey what the hell, get out of my bathroom. I didn’t say you tape me in the shower god damnit. Get the hell out you little bitch ass fucking motherfucker piece of shit… : (Jason gets out of the shower and goes to talk to his mom) : Jason : Woman, I need a ride to school. : Mom : No, you gotta walk, cause you were a mistake. : Jason : Bitch : (Jason smacks his mom than leaves to WALK to school) : (Jason is walking [strutting] down the street. The background music is the Saturday Night Fever Song) : (Jason sees a couple of girls on the corner and goes to talk to them) : Jason : Hey, why you lovely ladies look so down? : Lady 1 : What are you talking about I’m happy. See look I’m smiling. : Jason : Yeah sure baby, you know you want a Big Jay to make you feel all better. : Lady 1 : But I told you I’m perfectly fine. : Jason : (to lady 2) So baby you wanna have a taste of Big Jay? : Lady 2 : What! : Jason : You heard me hoe. I want you to suck my cock bitch. : (Ladies 1 and 2 smack Jason than leave)(Jason gets up like nothing happened and goes to school) : 12:30 PM, High School Lunch Room : Tamir : Hey Jason I heard that Nicole wanted to suck your dick. : John : Me too. : Jason : Sweet! : (Jason goes over to Nicole’s table) : Jason : (to Nicole) Hey hoe I heard that you wanted to suck my lucious cock. : Nicole : What! : (Nicole punches Jason in the face, than Jason puts his jaw back in place) : Jason : Okay bitch 8:00 is fine for me. : : Nicole : Get the hell away from me you freak! : 5:30 Nicole’s house : (Jason rings the doorbell and whips it out) : (Nicole’s dad answers the door) : Nicole’s Dad : What the hell, Jesus Christ Oh Might! Who the hell are you, and why do you have your dick out! : Jason : Where is your daughter? She is supposed to suck my cock. : Dad : Jesus put your dick away! What do you mean suck your cock? : Jason : I don’t think so bitch. We had a date and she is supposed to suck my dick. : Dad : No, I don’t think so, kid and PLEASE put your dick away? : Jason : Where is my Bitch? : Dad : Wait! I know you. Your that kid that keeps hiding in my bushes and looking in my window. : Jason : No, that’s Tamir. : (Tamir jumps up out of the bushes and runs down the street while Nicole’s Dad chases and yells at him) : Dad : Hey you little bastard come back here so I can beat the shit outta you! : (While Nicole’s Dad leaves the property to go after Tamir, Jason walks in the house and locks the door behind him) : (Jason walks into the living room where Nicole and her mom are watching TV) : Nicole : What the hell are you doing here Jason? : Jason : I’m supposed to have my dick sucked woman! Remember. : Nicole’s Mom : Who is this kid, Nicole? : Nicole : It’s this kid Jason from school. : Nicole’s Mom : Why does he think that you’re going to suck his dick? : Nicole : I don’t know, let’s call the cops. : Nicole’s Mom : (to Jason) Get out or we’ll call the cops! : Jason : I already took the pleasure of “disconnecting” the phone lines. : (Jason looks down at his hands which are black because he burnt them cutting the telephone wire outside) : Jason : By the way do you have any iodine? : Nicole’s Mom : Oh my God he’s crazy! : : Jason : Bitch who told you that you could speak. : Nicole’s Mom : How dare you talk to me like that! : Jason : Fuck you! (to Nicole) And Nicole I want my dick sucked. : (There’s a knock at the door) : Jason : I’ll get it. : Dad : (Huffing and puffing, talking to himself) : I’m glad I caught that little pervert and kicked the shit outta him. : Jason : So what’s up bitch. : Dad : What the fuck are you doing in my house! Let me the fuck in! : Jason : Where do you hide your liquor? I want some Liquor. : Dad : I’m not gonna tell you. Now let me in! : Jason : (With a smile on his face and his fingers crossed) : I’ll let you in if you tell me where the liquor is. : Dad : All right it’s in the basement. : Jason : I thought so bitch. : Dad : Wait you said you let me in. (to himself) Damnit! : (Jason goes to the basement and finds the liquor) (He sits there and drinks it with Nicole and her mom) : 2 hours later : (Jason walks to the door, Nicole’s Dad is still sitting there on the steps waiting) : Jason : Hey bitch, how are you doing? You hungry? : Dad : Yea, let me in so I can get some food. : Jason : I’ll let you in if you get more liquor. : Dad : Yea just like you said you were gonna let me in before. : Jason : Just fucking do it hoe! : Dad : Ok, but how? I have no money. : Jason : I guess you’ll just have to rob a store. : Dad : Rob a store! I don’t think I could do that. : Jason : If you don’t I’ll kill your family. : Dad : But how? I don’t have a weapon. : Jason : Here use this candy bar, it looks like a gun when you put it in your pocket. : Dad : Whoa, wait a minute a candy bar? : Jason : Yea dumbass, a candy bar. Now go bitch before I get impatient. : (Nicole’s Dad leaves) (Then Tamir crawls back behind the bush with a black eye and a bloody lip) (Tamir looks into the window) : Tamir : Holy shit how did Jason get in there? : (Tamir goes to the front door and rings the bell) : (Jason answers the door) : Jason : What the hell are you doing here aren’t you supposed to be in the bushes? : Tamir : Gatorade is it in you? Dun na na na na Dun na na na na : Jason : Get your ass back in the bushes, Tamir! : (Jason slams the door in Tamir’s face and breaks his nose)(Tamir goes back to the bushes) : Jason : Hey Nicole’s mom, Get out of my house! : Nicole’s Mom : But this is my… : Jason : (interrupts Nicole’s Mom) Get your ass out woman! : (Jason kicks out Nicole’s Mom and she finds Tamir in the bushes) : Nicole’s Mom : Hey, what are you doing in my bushes? : Tamir : Uh uh I told you, I dropped my keys. : Nicole’s Mom : Than what are those binoculars for? : Tamir : Um, um, oh, I was holding them for a friend. : Nicole’s Mom : Get the hell out of my bush! : (Tamir leaves the bush, but goes to the next one right next to it) : (We see Nicole’s Dad walking into an imitation Krauser’s) : Hindu #1 : Hello, how may I help you? : Dad : Where is your liquor at? : Hindu #1 : Over there. : (While Nicole’s Dad is looking for the liquor, Tamir is talking to Hindo #2) : Hindu #2 : Put that back now! : Tamir : Put what back? : Hindu #2 : The playboy you are holding in your hand. : Tamir : What playboy? : Hindu #2 : The one in your hand I can plainly see it. : Tamir : Oh this, I told you I bought this before I came in the store. : Hindu #2 : Yea sure, what store did you buy it from? : Tamir : That one over there. : (Tamir points to an abandoned warehouse across the street) : Hindu #2 : That not a store, that and abandoned warehouse. : Tamir : Well I’ll be damned it is. : Hindu #2 : Get the hell out of my store! : (Tamir leaves with the stolen playboy) : Hindu #2 : Hey get back here with my magazine! : (Dad tries to rob the liquor store with the candy bar and it fails) : Dad : Give me all your liquor. : Hindu #2 : Hey that’s not a gun, that’s a candy bar I can see the wrapper it’s a Snickers. : (The background says and in big letters this comes up on the screen) : IT’S GONNA BE AWHILE? GRAB A SNICKERS. : : Hindu #1 : (Hindu #1 hits the police button under the table and pulls out a gun) : Ok bitch you gonna die! : Dad : Oh shit! : (Nicole’s Dad runs out of the store) : (Back out Nicole’s house) (Nicole and Jason are drunk from the liquor before) : Jason : So I says to the guy, I says, I says, I says, I says, I says, um. : 2 ½ hours later : (Nicole’s Dad is meeting with the mob) : Dad : Hey, I’ll give you one million dollars if you give me some liquor. : Tony Soprano : Why? : Dad : Cause some kid said he’ll kill my family if I don’t get him some liquor. : Tony : Ok, just wait while I get it. : (Tony gets the liquor and brings it to Nicole’s Dad) : Ok now, where is my money? : Dad : Um um it’s right… : (Nicole’s Dad grabs the liquor and runs for his life) : Tony : Hey bitch get over here! (to Big Pussy) He must die. : (While outside running, the cops spot Nicole’s Dad and chase him) (After one hour of running, he finally reaches his house and rings the doorbell) : Jason : Who is it? : Dad : It’s me, I got the liquor. : (Jason runs to the door to get his liquor) : Jason : Give me my liquor. : Dad : You gonna let me in? : (Jason with his fingers crossed says) : Jason : Yea, sure, no problem. : (He opens the door and grabs the liquor and slams the door in Nicole’s Dad’s face) : Dad : Hey you said that you were gonna let me in. : Jason : I did? : Dad : Yea : Jason : I don’t remember saying that. : (The mob and police and army come down the street, with their guns ready to kill) : (Tamir is sitting by the bushes) : Cop : Hey look a black kid, Shoot him! : (Tamir gets shoot and carries on a 3-4 minute death scene [cause this movie needs to be longer]) : Tamir : Oh shit if I’m gonna die, Then, my last words will be GOT MILK. : (Tamir dies and John runs in from nowhere and holds him in his arms) : John : Noooooooooooooooooo! : (John leaves) : KKK Member : Hi, I’m part of the Triple K and I don’t believe that the black community should get abused by the police. No more police brutality on blacks… bullshit! : Dad : Kid, let me in they’re gonna kill me! : Jason : Yea sure ok. : Dad : I’m not lying! : Jason : Bullshit. : Dad : Oh God no please don’t kill me! : (They all shoot him over 200 times. Nicole’s Dad dies) : (Jason walks outside) : Jason : Well I guess he wasn’t lying after all. (to the army guy in the tank) Why is the army here? : Army Guy : How should I know you wrote this script! : Jason : Uh huh? : (Jason goes back inside) : Narrator : Jason gets Nicole drunk and she finally sucks his dick. : Or does she? Du nu nu : PS : The government covered up the whole thing and we never hear about it again. Until…? : THE END : Cast : Jason : Tamir : Nicole : Nicole’s Dad : Nicole’s Mom : Tony Soprano : Hindu Clerk #1 : Hindu Clerk #2 : John : Jason’s Mom : Lady 1 : Lady 2 : KKK Member : Army guy : Cop : LESBIAN SEAGULL : By Jason AKA the Blazin Caucasian : : A Blazin Caucasian Production

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