tee-hee...these are actual ads......

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: FREE YORKSHIRE TERRIER. : > > 8 YEARS OLD. HATEFUL LITTLE DOG. : > > ---------------------------------- : > > FREE PUPPIES: : > > 1/2 COCKER SPANIEL : > > 1/2 SNEAKY NEIGHBOR'S DOG : > > ----------------------------- : > > FREE PUPPIES... PART GERMAN SHEPHERD, PART STUPID DOG : > > ------------------------------ : > > GERMAN SHEPHERD 85 lbs. : > > NEUTERED. SPEAKS GERMAN. FREE. : > > ------------------------------------- : > > FOUND: DIRTY WHITE DOG. : > > LOOKS LIKE A RAT... : > > BEEN OUT AWHILE.. : > > BETTER BE REWARD. : > > ----------------------------------- : > > 1 MAN, 7 WOMAN HOT TUB -- $850/offer : > > ---------------------------- : > > SNOW BLOWER FOR SALE... : > > ONLY USED ON SNOWY DAYS. : > > ------------------------------- : > > COWS, CALVES NEVER BRED... : > > ALSO 1 GAY BULL FOR SALE. : > > ----------------------------------- : > > FULL-SIZED MATTRESS. 20 YR. WARRANTY. : > > LIKE NEW. SLIGHT URINE SMELL. : > > ------------------------------------ : > > NORDIC TRACK $300 : > > HARDLY USED, CALL CHUBBY : > > ------------------------------------- : > > HUMMERS - LARGEST SELECTION EVER - "IF IT'S IN STOCK, WE HAVE IT!" : > > ---------------------------------------- : > > GEORGIA PEACHES : > > CALIFORNIA GROWN - 89 cents lb. : > > ------------------------------------------ : > > NICE PARACHUTE: : > > NEVER OPENED - USED ONCE : > > ------------------------------------------- : > > TIRED OF WORKING FOR ONLY $9.75 PER HOUR? WE OFFER PROFIT SHARING AND : > > FLEXIBLE HOURS. STARTING PAY: : > > $7 -- $9 PER HOUR. : > > ------------------------------------------- : > > EXERCISE EQUIPMENT: : > > QUEEN SIZE MATTRESS & BOX SPRINGS - $175. : > > ------------------------------------------- : > > JOINING NUDIST COLONY! : > > MUST SELL WASHER & DRYER $300. : > > ------------------------------------------ : > > ALZHEIMER'S CENTER PREPARES : > > FOR AN AFFAIR TO REMEMBER : > > ------------------------------------------- : > > OPEN HOUSE : > > BODY SHAPERS TONING SALON : > > FREE COFFEE & DONUTS : > > --------------------------------------- : > > (AND THE BEST ONE) FOR SALE BY OWNER Complete set of Encyclopedia : > > Britannica. 45 volumes. Excellent condition. $1,000.00 or best offer. : > No : > > longer needed. Got married last weekend. Wife knows everything.

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