My Movie Credos - not that anyone wants them

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Posted by McChump at spider-tm071.proxy.aol.com on June 19, 2002 at 01:04:08:

I give you the twenty credos that relatively sum up my taste and opinions on film. If you don’t like them, go rent some over dramatic piece of garbage with Julia Stiles and/or Mandy Moore or buy a ticket for any number of non-cerebral Stallone offerings. Either way, I’ll still be here.

 I believe John Hughes has been possessed by the soul of Walt Disney.
 I imagine a world where all Baldwins work at used car lots and telemarketing services.
 I worship the pre-Man on the Moon Jim Carrey, and chuckle as a guy who once played Fire Marshall Bill delivers dramatic lines.
 I love Leonardo Di Caprio when he’s typecast as a mental invalid or acting opposite legends like Kirk Cameron.
 I think Fast Times at Ridgemont High is a classic and that Clueless is fittingly titled.
 I view the Coen brothers as misunderstood geniuses and the Farrelly brothers as gods.
 I claim that Kevin Smith is to modern dialogue what the Mona Lisa was to Renaissance drag queens.
 I can see how people enjoy Titanic . . .no. No, I can’t.
 I yearn for a Travoltian comeback for the great Anthony Michael Hall.
 I know that Bill Paxton and Bill Pullman are the same actor with one very talented make-up artist.
 I show great respect to Peck, Heston, and Bogart, yet I view Brando somewhere between Howard Hughes and Howard the Duck.
 I like Julia Roberts and Sandra Bullock . . .sue me.
 I hate anything that would label itself a Pauley Shore vehicle.
 I saw Episode I twice on opening day and did not imitate Vader or play air-lightsaber once . . .that day.
 I still watch Weird Science at least twice a month.
 I am aware that George Clooney started out as a sidebar player on Facts of Life, and I shall never forgive him for it.
 I admit that Old Yeller makes me cry, but hide that Steel Magnolias makes me ball.
 I classify Point Break as comedy because its cast includes the three of the top-five worst actors of all time: Keanu, Swayze, and Busey. If Affleck and Goldblum had made the credits I might have overloaded on overacting.
 I did not feel sorry for Costner after Waterworld, but I did after that Elvis impersonators do armed robbery fiasco.
 I really need to spend less time in worlds of pixels and light and more in ones made of grass and mud.

I write a monthly movie review called "Popcorn with Poncho" for www.bulletproofpopemobile.com... if anyone's interested.

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that was funny as hell here are mine . . . . NJStatuteSection2A170/51 01:20:00 6/19/02 (0)
I dig it man, thx for the document, be checkingUnt Edwards, Banky 01:13:01 6/19/02 (0)

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: I give you the twenty credos that relatively sum up my taste and opinions on film. If you don’t like them, go rent some over dramatic piece of garbage with Julia Stiles and/or Mandy Moore or buy a ticket for any number of non-cerebral Stallone offerings. Either way, I’ll still be here. :  I believe John Hughes has been possessed by the soul of Walt Disney. :  I imagine a world where all Baldwins work at used car lots and telemarketing services. :  I worship the pre-Man on the Moon Jim Carrey, and chuckle as a guy who once played Fire Marshall Bill delivers dramatic lines. :  I love Leonardo Di Caprio when he’s typecast as a mental invalid or acting opposite legends like Kirk Cameron. :  I think Fast Times at Ridgemont High is a classic and that Clueless is fittingly titled. :  I view the Coen brothers as misunderstood geniuses and the Farrelly brothers as gods. :  I claim that Kevin Smith is to modern dialogue what the Mona Lisa was to Renaissance drag queens. :  I can see how people enjoy Titanic . . .no. No, I can’t. :  I yearn for a Travoltian comeback for the great Anthony Michael Hall. :  I know that Bill Paxton and Bill Pullman are the same actor with one very talented make-up artist. :  I show great respect to Peck, Heston, and Bogart, yet I view Brando somewhere between Howard Hughes and Howard the Duck. :  I like Julia Roberts and Sandra Bullock . . .sue me. :  I hate anything that would label itself a Pauley Shore vehicle. :  I saw Episode I twice on opening day and did not imitate Vader or play air-lightsaber once . . .that day. :  I still watch Weird Science at least twice a month. :  I am aware that George Clooney started out as a sidebar player on Facts of Life, and I shall never forgive him for it. :  I admit that Old Yeller makes me cry, but hide that Steel Magnolias makes me ball. :  I classify Point Break as comedy because its cast includes the three of the top-five worst actors of all time: Keanu, Swayze, and Busey. If Affleck and Goldblum had made the credits I might have overloaded on overacting. :  I did not feel sorry for Costner after Waterworld, but I did after that Elvis impersonators do armed robbery fiasco. :  I really need to spend less time in worlds of pixels and light and more in ones made of grass and mud. : I write a monthly movie review called "Popcorn with Poncho" for www.bulletproofpopemobile.com... if anyone's interested.

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