Posted by SCOTT WEBB at user-vcaujau.dsl.mindspring.com on May 25, 2003 at 06:56:09:
Dear freinds and fellow Kevin smith lovers,
I would like to make it known that due to the kevin smith moviess O no longer believe in the trinity that I have grown up with. The father, THe Son, and the Holy gohst. now mean very little to me due to the kevin smith and view askew movies. I still however believe in all three of them but it is no longer a trinity. I now believ in the father, the son, the holy ghost, and the Kevin Smith.
I whole heartedly have put myself to spreading the word of my newfound leader. I have recently moved to IOWA in order to start a cult. We will devote our lives to worshiping these greatbeings amoung us. We will spread their word throughout the land to let all bask in the glory of kevin smith.
We have already shown many people the light and the great and amazing ways of Kevin Smith. We have prayer three times a day to our wise god. WE are praised in his name and he graciously bestows fine works of art amoungst us. We will pettition the government to make his birthday a national holiday so that we may be devoted to prayer on such a great occasion.
Now I ask of you all, Who is with me? Who will spread the word of our lord to the uneducated, the unenlightened, and the just plain fuckin stupid. Let suzzane the orangatuan reign free amoungst the land. Let us all know of the triumph over the rubber poop monster.
Answer the call and join me on my quest!
Scott
Current leader of the Curch of Smith