Posted by jkm822 at michigan.mgmt.rpi.edu on June 02, 2003 at 08:36:25:
In Reply to: Because Loss and Grief is on our minds posted by Heatherondo.. on June 02, 2003 at 02:31:12:
: Have you experienced losing someone close to you?
Sort of.
: Who?
I've lost both grandfathers, a cat we had for 16 years (hey, it was a big deal to me, OK?), and a friend.
: How did you deal with the loss?
Not very well. The first grandfather died when I was pretty young, and he'd had a stroke several months previously. I went to visit him in the hospital, and he was paralyzed all down one side. I couldn't deal; I never went to visit him again. I've never really forgiven myself for that.
My other grandfather and my cat died at about the same time, last year. My grandfather lived in Florida, and I'd seen him perhaps 5 times in the last 10 years. He was a very sweet man, and I loved him, but he'd been ailing for quite some time, so it was almost a mercy. I won't go into why, but I was pretty much unconsolable about my cat, even though he'd had cancer for the last 5 years.
And my friend, with whom I worked, died the day before Halloween. He committed suicide. And I didn't deal with it well AT ALL. I flipped out, frankly. I'd never known anyone who actually went through with it before. And I'd talked to him, joked with him, THAT DAY. He'd been looking forward to seeing my Halloween costume. I was one step away from hysterics for days, except when I took that step.
I don't deal with death very well. Hence me not being overwhelmingly eloquent earlier, when I read Kevin's post. I just don't know what to say.
: tell us something wonderful about that person.
My first grandfather was an amazingly vital man, who loved to tickle me until I couldn't breathe and call my grandmother, "Chick." He was a gruff, but funny man, and I wish I had known him better.
My second grandfather was the child of Jewish immigrants who came here just before the Holocaust. He was a self-made businessman, and he (and my grandmother) created my father, for which I will always be grateful. Not because of the obvious reason - without my dad, there's no me - but because I adore my father and can't imagine life without him. I know it's going to happen someday, but I can only hope beyond hope that it's a good long ways off. My father is unbelievably special to me, and I love him more than I can put into words.
My cat was exceptionally stupid, and drooled when he got excited, but he was the nicest, sweetest cat you could ever have. He was there for me from the time my uncle gave him to me for Christmas when I was 10 until I moved up here to Albany. He was a great cat. I miss him.
Rob was... overwhelmingly generous, intelligent, and kind. He was... he opened his heart to everyone. Maybe too much. I wish I'd had the chance to get to know him better. Barely a day goes by that I don't think of him.
Well, I'm good and depressed, now. *sigh*