Posted by REDBANKSQUADr at adsl-64-161-173-84.dsl.lsan03.pacbell.net on June 04, 2003 at 03:12:16:
After reading Kevin's post the other day about his father I was really moved and saddened.
It's been on my mind for a few days now and I find myself writing this on the 4th anniversary of my little brother's own death.
What I came to realize was that Kevin, his movies, his fans, and this entire community is incredibly tight knit despite its numbers and differences. And what Kevin has created here is far more than just a fan base and movie community.
When Andrew (my brother) passed away it was very tragic and difficult. I was put in the unfortunate situation of trying to save him and failing. He, like Kevin's dad, died of a massive heart attack (his due to complications since birth). While that day and night are much of a blur now, I do remember some things. One was coming to the board after the paramedics had arrived and immediately posting something about the situation. I'm not sure why I did it, but I think that if I could just get more prayers maybe the strength of the masses would pull him thorugh. Regradless, the response was overwheling. Many many replies with prayers and consolation and several emails (including one from Kim Loughran sending all of View Askew's prayers). Another thing I remember was going home after he had passed and not sleeping for days. The movie I immediately turned to though to occupy some time that first night --- Mallrats. Again, I'm not sure why, but it just felt right and comforting at the time.
As that summer went on I also recall having a major crisis of faith with my maker. And while I was battling my problems, at the same time Kevin was battling his own crisis with Dogma and the Catholic League. So here I am, a Catholic, angry at God, and a fan and admirer of Kevin. I see him handle his situation and it helps a little.
What I came to realize after much time had passed was that all these little things; the board, the movies, Kevin himself helped ease a tremendous pain.
I'm still in some pain and I imagine that I will be for some time to come but I also find myself at theis board every June 3rd.
So Kevin, if you ever read this, thank you. Thank you for something far deeper than dick & fart jokes. Thank you for more than just inspiring me in career and life. Thank you.
I'll always be doing my best to turn that same favor for someone else in the future, even if they don't realize it.
I hope all the prayers and thoughts have helped a little in easing your pain.
Rob LiCalsi