Posted by Trent Reno at ool-18bb8d52.dyn.optonline.net on August 25, 2003 at 12:40:25:
This is a post of mine from last Feb. I ran into it in the archives, and I thought it'd be fun to repost it.
In Bizarro View Askew World, it's called Askew View (or AV).
In AV world, the message boards go downwards and people flame posts that make too much sense. If you do get out of hand on the AV poll, you'll hear it from a poster named Biggs.
The only reds you see every day are Kevin and Ben Affleck. From time to time, Vincent will pop up and request questions. He might not answer them, though.
In AV world, Jay Mewes in on the cover of Highlights magazine.
In AV world, all AV films are rated G. The most controversial word ever spoken in an AV film is "poopie." Every film has an entirely different cast. The upcoming "New York Girl" stars Ashley Judd and Luke Perry, who hate each other so much it hurts.
Amy Noble wears three layers of sweaters every day in AV world.
AV DVDs have no commentaries, and only one deleted scene. And the deleted scene sucks.
In AV world, Mallrats won several Academy Awards. They even invented a category for best duo, and Jay and Chatty Bob were the winners. An all CG character named Trixie was also featured in the film.
In AV world, Clerks TAS is bigger than Friends, Kevin owns Disney, and nobody protested the film "DOGMA: Catholicism is the right religion." Surprisingly though, Dave Mandel is still a fat man.
Everyone is comfortable with their sexuality in AV world.
In AV world, this post is hilarious.
Ralphy