Bartleby's Last Thoughts

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: This is a little something I wrote after having watched Dogma. It's got spoilers and such so beware if you haven't seen the flick. And also, this poem ended up being a little too long. Still, it conveyed what I was trying to express so I'm happy. Let me know what you think. I'm really hoping that this whole thing shows up. : I look into Her eyes and then I realize : All I want to do is apologize : But its too late and I've gone too far : And I think briefly of the Morningstar. : How did I become this lost and deceived? : Look at what I am as compared to what I used to be : My shame so deep but only now : So blinded, I forgot the truth somehow. : I had long since fallen and gone my own way : And now I look into Her eyes and know not what to say : All this time I thought I'd been betrayed : But in actuality it was my sin for making him stray. : I couldn't understand it before : As to why I wasn't welcomed anymore : Why I was cursed to this existence : That lead me to wage this war. : I see in a grim vision : All those in the past : Who ate the fruit : And suffered Her wrath. : I convinced my friend : That Her ways were wrong : That he had to stand up to Her : That he had to be strong. : And he did what I urged : And threw down his sword : He rejected his duty : And forsaked his Lord. : It was because of me : Don't you see? : In my self-rightousness : I turned him away from his duty. : And in that act : We sealed our fates : We were forever barred : From entering the gates. : Then one day came this plan : A way to return to where we were banned : I urged him again to follow my way : And I knew that he would all the end. : As we journeyed : My bitternes grew : My motives changed : As I threw away all once held true. : He tried to warn me but my resentment was too deep : I would strike back and not delay : And let all those who stood in my way : Innocence regardless, have hell to pay. : He reminded me of the one before : Who had too been denied entrance to the sacred doors : But I refused to listen, fueled only by rejection : I would not give in, I had broken down and given in to sin. : I laid my judgement and vengeance upon them all : Showed them that I was powerful while they were small : No one would stop me now this close to my goal : I would enter those doors and purify my soul. : He tried once again : To deter me from my missioin : There was no pause as I plunged : The knife into his skin. : No remorse for killing my best friend. : How did I get here : And become this thing : I grieve for what may have happened : Had She not intervened. : I had wanted to strike Her back : And take from her as she had taken from me : Now I know she wasn't to blame : It was my transgression, now plain to see. : Yet I held her accountable : All the same : But now I've learned my lesson : And crumble before Her in shame. : She embraces me one last time : And I feel that touch that I was lost without : I let go and weep for what I have done : How I had turned against here and for what I'd become : She opens her mouth and reveals a cry : And as I close my eyes : I say goodbye to Her presence once more : Then there is emptiness as my body dies. : Chris

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