Re: KEVIN! WHO ARE YOU, MAN?

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: : Okay, Kevin, what in the deal? : : Do you hate 12th grade comp students? : -Yes he does. : Because those of us trying to do reports on our favorite director are having just a wee bit of trouble digging up any info on your past. Don't you have a biographer? : -Probably. : Kevin, inquiring minds like mine wanna know! Where did you grow up? : -Um... This is just a shot in the dark... NEW JERSEY? : What did you do in high school? : -Probably slept through half of it like every other highschooler on the planet. : Were you personally involved in watergate? : -According to his attorney, when Mr. Smith goes to Washington, he keeps a very low profile and generally keeps to himself. Although there have been unsubstantiated rumors about telephone calls to G. Gordon Liddy. : What did you mean when you told Vivian Leigh that Frankly, you didn't give a damn? : -Now you're just being silly. : Do you ever think back to your days on the set of Family Matters as the loveable goof Erkle? : -I think you're confusing him with Scott Mosier. : Do you derive your energy straight from the yellow sun? : -No, but he wears the cowl and flowing cape to strike fear into the hearts of criminals in the dead of night. : Is Cigarette smoking man really your father? : -Well, Kevin does smoke. But I don't know if that could really be a family resemblance... : Do you regret missing Fisk's homerun to meet your wife? : -Probably. : Where did you put Jimmy Hoffa? : -You know that burger you ate last night...? : Who stopped the rain? : -I heard that when the Pope was in NY back in the eighties, he said a prayer and it stopped raining. But I might be misinformed. : Did you really coin the phrase "Who's your daddy?" : -No, but Maynard G. Crebbs helped perpetuate the phrase, "Daddy-O" back in the 60's. : Do you see dead people? : -I see brain dead people. They're everywhere. They don't know they're brain dead and they only see what they want to see. : After getting drenched in pig's blood at your prom, did you use psychic powers to destroy all the other people? : -Actually it wasn't pig's blood, some jackass started a fight and it ended up with the over turning of the punch bowl. : And as for the psychic powers... SHHHH!!!!! : : : ANSWER ME, MAN!

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