Alternative ending to The Empire Strikes Back

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Posted by Booboo_Kittiefukk at idxcmb01-28.idx.com.au on July 31, 2002 at 05:18:45:

Here's a little something I received in my email. Thought you all might enjoy it ^_^

> Alternative ending to The Empire Strikes Back
>
>
>
>A furious light sabre duel is under way. DARTH VADER is backing LUKE
>SKYWALKER toward the end of the gantry. A quick move by Vader, chops off
>Luke's hand! It goes spinning off into the ventilation shaft. Luke backs
>away. He looks round, but realizes there's nowhere to go but straight down.
>
>DARTH VADER: Obi Wan never told you what happened to your father.
>
>LUKE: He told me enough! He told me you killed him!
>
>DARTH VADER: No! I am your father!
>
>LUKE: No, it's not true! It's impossible.
>
>DARTH VADER: Search your feelings; you know it to be true.
>
>LUKE: NO!
>
>DARTH VADER: Yes, it is true and you know what else? You know that brass
>droid of yours?
>
>LUKE: Threepio?
>
>DARTH VADER: Yes, Threepio, I built him when I was seven years old.
>
>LUKE: No!
>
>DARTH VADER: Seven years old! And what have you done? Look at yourself,
>no hand, no job, and couldn't even levitate your own ship out of the swamp.
>
>LUKE: I destroyed your precious Death Star!
>
>DARTH VADER: When you were 20! When I was 10, I single-handedly
>destroyed a Trade Federation Droid Control ship!
>
>LUKE: Well, it's not my fault.
>
>DARTH VADER: Oh, here we go. 'Poor me, my father never gave me what I
>wanted for my birthday, boo hoo, my daddy's the Dark Lord of the Sith..
>waahhh wahhh!
>
>LUKE: Shut up.
>
>DARTH VADER: You're a slacker! By the time I was your age, I had
>exterminated the Jedi knights!
>
>LUKE: I used to race my T-16 through Beggar's Canyon...
>
>DARTH VADER: Oh, for the love of the Emperor, 10 years old, winner of >the Boonta Eve Open. Only human to ever fly a Pod Racer, right here >baby!
>
>Luke looks down the shaft. Takes a step toward it.
>
>DARTH VADER: I was wrong. You're not my kid. I don't know whose you are,
>but you sure ain't mine.
>
>Luke takes a step off the platform, hesitates, then plunges down the >shaft. Darth Vader looks down after him.
>
>DARTH VADER: And get a haircut!

Follow Ups:

that's funny...that was good!*nt* skunksmokinsnoogans 11:01:43 7/31/02 (0)
yes yes with the droid and the NO we've heard it. The Bastard 10:05:47 7/31/02 (0)
Sounds like my dad *nt* @ari* 05:25:31 7/31/02 (0)

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Comments:
: Here's a little something I received in my email. Thought you all might enjoy it ^_^ : : > Alternative ending to The Empire Strikes Back : > : > : > : >A furious light sabre duel is under way. DARTH VADER is backing LUKE : >SKYWALKER toward the end of the gantry. A quick move by Vader, chops off : >Luke's hand! It goes spinning off into the ventilation shaft. Luke backs : >away. He looks round, but realizes there's nowhere to go but straight down. : > : >DARTH VADER: Obi Wan never told you what happened to your father. : > : >LUKE: He told me enough! He told me you killed him! : > : >DARTH VADER: No! I am your father! : > : >LUKE: No, it's not true! It's impossible. : > : >DARTH VADER: Search your feelings; you know it to be true. : > : >LUKE: NO! : > : >DARTH VADER: Yes, it is true and you know what else? You know that brass : >droid of yours? : > : >LUKE: Threepio? : > : >DARTH VADER: Yes, Threepio, I built him when I was seven years old. : > : >LUKE: No! : > : >DARTH VADER: Seven years old! And what have you done? Look at yourself, : >no hand, no job, and couldn't even levitate your own ship out of the swamp. : > : >LUKE: I destroyed your precious Death Star! : > : >DARTH VADER: When you were 20! When I was 10, I single-handedly : >destroyed a Trade Federation Droid Control ship! : > : >LUKE: Well, it's not my fault. : > : >DARTH VADER: Oh, here we go. 'Poor me, my father never gave me what I : >wanted for my birthday, boo hoo, my daddy's the Dark Lord of the Sith.. : >waahhh wahhh! : > : >LUKE: Shut up. : > : >DARTH VADER: You're a slacker! By the time I was your age, I had : >exterminated the Jedi knights! : > : >LUKE: I used to race my T-16 through Beggar's Canyon... : > : >DARTH VADER: Oh, for the love of the Emperor, 10 years old, winner of >the Boonta Eve Open. Only human to ever fly a Pod Racer, right here >baby! : > : >Luke looks down the shaft. Takes a step toward it. : > : >DARTH VADER: I was wrong. You're not my kid. I don't know whose you are, : >but you sure ain't mine. : > : >Luke takes a step off the platform, hesitates, then plunges down the >shaft. Darth Vader looks down after him. : > : >DARTH VADER: And get a haircut!

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