And this explains why you are my guru...


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Posted by Isis at d2037.dialup.cornell.edu on February 24, 2000 at 10:58:14:

In Reply to: Re: UMass Trip posted by Kevin on February 24, 2000 at 10:06:10:

Man...you understand. I don't know if I can articulate how deeply it impresses me and affects me that you understand and appreciate the depth of injustice women face. My admiration for you increases tenfold.

And as for the Queen of Class & Style, your significant other, I've just become her biggest fan.

A few comments...

: I've gotta say, for the record, that at the start of our relationship (and
: even now, from time to time), I, too, felt as Mark Cowling feels - that it
: seems myopic to focus on violence against one gender/race/whatever, when
: it's ALL violence that should be vanquished instead. Why say "Don't beat
: women," when the thought should be "Don't beat anybody"? I guess it was
: the Christian idealist in me thinking that if we broke ourselves into
: sub-groups less and thought of ourselves as one world more, there'd be less
: of an adversarial relationship between the sexes/races/creeds/etc.

Violence, of course, is entirely related to those very adversarial relationships which exist between groups as well as individuals. However, differences *do* exist, and simply not acknowledging them doesn't vanquish violence. I tend to get nervous at such similar "one world" arguments because they easily lead to the argument that everyone should conform, accept the norm, and assimilate themselves to the "one world", whose structure is usually determined by white males. We are one world, but we are made of many components, colors, genital shapes, etc. The key to ending hatred lies not in refusing to see difference but in celebrating and respecting it. After all, we're all dependant upon one another for our survival.

I don't think I'm making much sense but maybe you are getting my point.

: For example: I used to feel that I've only ever known two women who've been
: raped. How sad a thought is that? 'Only two'? Imagine saying "I've only
: known two people who were murdered." Or "I've only known two guys who've
: had their dicks brutally cut off against their will." Society's become so
: - not so much tolerant as - accepting of rape that someone like myself
: knows two people who've survived it and I've felt (at one point) that those
: are pretty low numbers. That's sad.

Consider also that those are only the women you know who admitted it to you. Quite a lot of women who are raped internalize it and would never admit to the "shame". Now THAT's an injustice that can stick in your craw.

: Why am I suddenly so sensitive to this subject?

I would assume you are a feeling human with compassion and a soul.

: Fuck, man - I have a daughter and a wife. And while I don't need to
: instruct my wife on the subject (as she's instructed me), I WILL be
: teaching my daughter that if any man lays a hand on her in a way that's not
: invited or overly aggressive, then she's to take the mother fucker's life.
: No questions asked, no exceptions made. It may not be a Christian
: approach, but what can I say? I'd rather have a daughter than a martyr.
: She'll never be a victim, if Jen or I can help it.

I'm about to say something which will probably seal my enmity with quite a few of the males on this board, but this is how I see it. It is too much to ask of a woman that she be required to commit murder to protect herself from rape. No woman should have to take that on her soul.

What I do suggest, is return what is received. If there's an attack made on your sexuality, well then by all rights make an equal attack back. Lorena Bobbitt may have frightened some males, but consider: *one* severed penis during 6000 years of patriarchal oppression & rape. At least Lorena concentrated her anger towards the object of her oppression.

If a man attempts to rape me, I won't kill him. But he won't ever be raping anyone again, I promise you that. So ladies, if someone is about to violate your sacred flesh, play along until you can grab that sack and squeeze 'em until they pop.

Sorry guys, but that's the way it is. Welcome to our harsh reality.

And before we go any further, let me make this clear...I believe I've made it clear to everyone on this board before, I worship the penis. I don't hate it. But its beauty is diminished and its sanctity destroyed when it is used as a weapon.

Regardless of whatever threat of violence it brings, I'm grateful to be born a woman. I've not been subjected to cultural messages telling me that my genitals should be an instrument of torture for other humans. Respect your cock, guys, and respect yourselves. And that just ain't possible without respecting women as well.

: So thanks, Boo - for everything you've given me, AND for teaching me
: something that I'm ashamed I didn't already know. I'm proud of you. You
: continue to rock my world, and I love you more than life.

: Am I whipped? Oh yeah. But am I complaining? Hell no. Why not?

: Because in addition to everything else, my wif

Damn, y'all are too cute. You've both renewed my faith in the world in a matter of 24 hours and I thank you for it.

Much respect to the power couple --

Isis


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