Posted by Strictly Skewed at 206.165.115.194 on February 25, 2004 at 11:21:18:
In Reply to: Re: because her environment fostered it? posted by Xtian on February 25, 2004 at 11:01:25:
: if i had been sympathetic, i would have expressed sympathy... if i wanted her to get over it, i would have used the words 'get over it'...but probably slapped a 'bitch' on the end for emphasis.
Fine, you're not sympathetic. Someone comes on this board, and opens up a wound for you to see, to make a point. Okay, in addition to what she said there are other factors, that doesn't make what she said wrong. It could be, and probably is a factor. I find your approach to discussion very callous.
: what i wanted to do, and i think i did, was point out that kids aren’t raised in a vacuum, and that the remaining parent probably had as much to do with the resultant attitude as the absent one.
Yes, I understand your agenda.
: : Sorry, guess that's life.
: perhaps it is life, but that doesn’t mean I have to like it or accept it or allow other people in my event horizon to foster it. consider me the board change agent, if you will.
: :Generalizations may be difficult at times, but they're also necessary. Generalizations help us understand that other people are different from us, and give us at least a starting point about how to deal with this.
: on paper, sure, they do. in reality (where i often go for indian take away) generalizations are end points, they offer the weak minded and weak willed to latch onto an already formed and accepted opinion, preventing them from having to form their own. comforting, isn’t it? necessary? definitely not.
I think you're being naive here. You use generalizations all the time. Every time you meet somebody new, you make generalizations, you have to, otherwise communication is impossible. And yes, generalizations also cause trouble, no argument. Necessary evil.
: : Not sure what you mean by this.
: what i meant by that is that if i was raised at the foot of a drinking womanizer, i might take to drink and womanizing, and have some pretty screwed up views on women…and drinking.
See, now, you have made assumptions, and they are completely incorrect. I am neither someone who abuses alcohol, nor someone who womanizes. Also, I think I have very healthy views on women, or at least, usually when someone has been affected the way you're talking about, men have views about women that are very dismissive and abusive. I swing very much the other way.